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Location: Ohio, United States

I am on a fantastic journey, embracing life with everything I've got!

Thursday, September 29, 2005


Everybody's got their own good reason
Why their favorite season is their favorite season
- Echo and the Bunnymen

First of all, I have to say that I was honored someone actually requested, with a very big please, to make a post in my blog. I guess I am just not a regular blogger--in fact, I've been trying to cut back the amount of time I spend online. RP is enough! Also, I've been spending a lot of time going inward--and not really feeling like expressing myself publicly.

Okay, having said all that--this is a snapshot of my life at present.

It's AUTUMN!!!! Whoop! (.25 to Sean) Autumn has always been my favorite season---the clear skies, the crisp air, the glorious colors....and my birthday. Right smack in the heart of it all. I was worried that it wouldn't be the same living in California--but you know what? The change of seasons is still evident, in its own way. For awhile, it was getting cooler, and certain trees actually had leaves that turned red. The air is clear and I can see the Channel Islands every day. But now...I think the Santa Anas are here (or something like them). There was hot, dry wind blowing around yesterday. Two days before that, there was all this dramatic mist hovering down at the beach. I took a walk through it, feeling it caress my face and skin....seeing the sun shimmer just behind it, and having the beach all to myself to walk and sing along with the handpicked songs on the iPod shuffle that I won last about bliss! Ohmigod.

My job has been very fulfilling. I am a massage therapist at a "World Class Resort and Spa" and have had so many interesting clients from all over the place. It may not be as special and intimate as having your own regulars in a private practice--but I do connect with these people and still get the same joy from helping them go back into their bodies and into that quiet place of center, then sending them on their blissful, more vibrant and more relaxed way.I am also making the most money I've ever made at any one job (in my life)!

Unfortunately, it comes with a pricetag. This spa overworks their staff--in not spacing out appointments with time to rest up for the next one. My hands/tendons have been fatiguing a little too much. At first I was freaked out, feeling that I was like a racehorse, who could easily be replaced once she breaks down. But I'm beginning to do all the necessary things to protect myself--I ordered a "stretch for your health" DVD that my sister (another LMT) swears by, that helps people who do repetitive motion work. I do little stretches in between clients (waiting for them to step out of the room). I get regular massage myself, and I'm even considering scaling back my days to 4 instead of 5. This will all work out, as long as I'm careful.

But my eyes are still fixed on the goal of ending up in a very spiritual retreat-type place such as Esalen or Harbin. There is one very close to here, called Sycamore Springs. It has yoga, meditation, a labyrinth and a nice peaceful unhurried spa. I would love to work there.

My vision for moving out here was to be at a more holistic and spiritual place like that. Where I am now will be a good thing on a resume for when that dream comes true. In the meantime, Sycamore Springs is having a "stay for a day" special, and my birthday is coming up. I am thinking about going there and treating myself to it on my weekdays off.

I continue to enjoy the mountain trails, the waterfalls I can splash in, the walks to the beach, and the fit & healthy feeling they leave me with.

My writing is moving along again--rewriting a first chapter of my novel I'm submitting to agents (Writers Market 2006 has been ordered!), I'm up to about 80 pages on my new one, and have a "secret" children's book project underway! I have high hopes for that one.

I am still hit with occasional bouts of homesickness, and feelings of "my god, what am I doing here? why did I MOVE?" but they are normal, and they pass once I embrace them.

I'm getting increasingly dissatisfied with my single life--but that change will happen when it's time. I don't want to force anything and I don't want my libido to start calling the shots, either. In the meantime, I've been making smalltalk with men (who I sit by in cafes or meet on the beach) again, and engaging in minor's a good babystep for me, since my heart is still very much guarded from past experiences.

So--have I more than made up for lost time? I hope so!



Blogger Melanie said...

So this sounds like our conversation last night.

SO GOOD to see your fresh entry. And the light that enters your face as you share that honest and open shift in your relationship. it makes me smile, and hope!

it all happens in time i have to believe this. and hope that you will get what you desire in the end with abundance! no one deserves it more.

love you soul sistah! wish i could make the birthday party. :kiss:

11:42 PM  
Blogger bhd said...

Thanks for the update, Alexandra! You landed on your feet, dincha? :hug:

2:10 PM  
Blogger redpig77 said...

Hi Alex, Thanks for this entry. I am so happy that things have worked out for you. I hope you get that job out in Sycamore Springs.

11:29 PM  

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